Posted in Conversation Time, Uncategorized

Conversation Time #4

This week’s Question:

What memories do you have of your mother (her name, birth date, birthplace, parents, and so on)?

She’s still alive, so I’m not giving most of that away, either.

My mother is my best friend and always has been. I could never lie to her, she could see straight through me. I learned that pretty early on. It just meant I stopped bothering to try to lie to her. I told her everything and still do. She’s one of the few people in the world I can be honest with and her opinion of me won’t change because of it. I walk around with her face and freak people out (that’s a lot of fun), and we always know exactly what the other is thinking, because we’re pretty close to the same there, too! I’m always surprised when I can do something she doesn’t know how to, and just like Dad lets me talk him into some new form of geekery, Mom lets me talk her into new forms of craftery!

Mom stayed home with us until I was in third grade. She stood at the bus stop with us if she didn’t take us to school, herself. She picked me up from Kindergarten, because it was a half day. When I sent a kid to the hospital for bullying me, she didn’t scream at me! She nodded and let it go! She taught me how to scrub baseboards with a toothbrush for inspections and drove us home to Georgia when we moved back from Louisiana. When she went back to work, she trusted me to be the one with my head screwed on straight. I was the one with the key to the house in my backpack so we could get in after school every day. She taught me to cross stitch when I was eight and to crochet when I was twelve. I taught myself to sew, mostly because I watched her do it for most of my life. She made our clothes and Halloween costumes until work took her time away for that stuff! She crocheted afghans for our beds and was one of the three mom’s in our neighborhood yelling, “Time for Thundercats” while we were on base housing. She would shake her head and let me get away with reducing a chicken leg to scattered shreds of chicken instead of eating it and made me sit at the table for hours until I’d finished my steak. I forced down a fork full of collards and black eyed peas every New Years from birth because she got that “mom look” on her face and I wasn’t going to be the reason we didn’t have money that year!

When I was in High School, she was constantly supporting her overachieving geek of a kid through whatever endeavor she’d thrown herself in. She advocated to get me a better car because I had to be at school so early or so late doing everything from Band to Student Government and life would be easier if I had the means to get myself (and my poor sister) there without waiting for them to get off work or make them late for work taking us. She was at every game, football and basketball, cheering from the sidelines while I did my thing and working her tail off every other minute. She sent me to school with a bucket full of change because the band director told us to “Save our pennies” for a trip to Myrtle Beach that Spring. She could’ve taken it to the bank and exchanged it for paper money, but what fun would that be? It earned her a smirk from Mr. Macleod and then he made me count it all and take it to the bank for a deposit! Everyone loved my mom, too. She was the Band Mom everyone wished was theirs. She was supportive and overlooked silly stuff while still keeping her eye out for stuff we shouldn’t be doing. She was genuinely happy for everyone she adopted as her own, which was almost every member of a 100+ piece marching band. She cheered for them, cried with them, helped them get dressed and french braided their hair (She learned to do that so my hair would stay out of my face while I marched, people!).

In college, it was Mom who did most of my laundry because I fell asleep on the couch waiting for the drier and she didn’t have the heart to wake me up. It was Mom who told me to bring the poor screaming kitten that was under my apartment to her house and she’d take care of it. It was mom who brought a kitten into my apartment to keep me company. It was Mom who sighed with relief when I broke up with my boyfriend and groaned when I started dating another 300 miles away via the internet. It was Mom who was upset when I moved out and didn’t talk to me for a week because it was just too painful that I wasn’t at home where I should be. It was Mom who stocked my cabinets that first month, because “Everyone should have butter and ketchup, Tiffany.”

After college… she knew exactly which wedding dress I would fall in love with the second she laid eyes on it. She planned my wedding and reception and made it look EASY. She was there holding my hand when I signed myself into the hospital for my first C-section, and refusing to let Dad drive as she sped down I16 for the second one, fear for both me and my little Tadpole and tears at not being there earlier streaming from her eyes. When Peanut developed acid reflux and I hadn’t slept in three days? Mom was on the way and stayed with us for a week while I rested and still handled feedings and diapers and, now, medication. After each baby was born, she was there for two full weeks while we settled into life with a newborn! When I broke my ankle, she drove down to drive the girls to school because I couldn’t drive my car and Dana couldn’t be THAT late so often. She’s the one who changed the ice on my ankle after surgery and woke me up for meds. Who else but Mom does that?

Everyone wants their Mom when times get tough, but I can honestly say that I have the mom that EVERYONE wants when times get tough. I have loaned her out quite a few times to people who needed that support in their lives. She’s a great mom, whether she gave birth to you or not!

And now? Now she’s in the SCA, too. Know what? I’m still loaning her out. People still love her. I’m the envy of so many because my mom is the one I can call and don’t even have to ask if I can leave my girls with her while I handle disaster at home (Hurricanes, people. DISASTER!). She’s angry because she can’t help me more. Yeah, you read that right! She says events are different if I’m not around and enjoys them more when I am, even if I’m dragging her around because I can’t sit still. People who live closer have adopted her as theirs, too. So much so that I’m never sure which of the people on her friends list are now my family and which ones are still in the friend zone! And once you’re adopted, she’s got you! You’re screwed thinking you’ll get away with doing stupid stuff like forgetting to eat or not drinking enough water. If you have a baby, you better NOT get anywhere near her without letting her hold it for at least an hour while you go away and do whatever you need to do! She is the perfect grandmother, letting nothing get in between her and time with my monsters, and she accepts their quirky little selves, too.

Because that’s the way she is.

And she’s mine.

And yours.

And yours.

And yeah, yours, too.

But I want her back, got it?

Until next time!

Posted in Conversation Time, Uncategorized

Conversation Time #3

This week’s question:

What memories do you have of your father (his name, birth date, birthplace, parents, and so on)?

He’s still alive, so I’m not giving most of that away. However, I can talk about my Dad all day long. The problem is always, “Where do I start?”

My Dad is a really great man. I’ve always heard that a girl compares every man she meets to her father and it’s absolutely true. He’s not perfect and never claimed to be. He’s not “totes gorg!” but he’s not half bad to look at, either! He’s not a lot of things. What he is, though, is the best Dad in the world.

When I was little, my Dad encouraged every geeky thing I could think of doing. My friends and I wanted to play “Thundercats,” and not only did he approve, he cut a Sword of Omens  out and decorated it for our “Lion-O,” complete with a bike reflector over the eye! I grew up watching old Star Trek reruns enough to know what a Tribble was and why they were trouble and that Klingons would happily spill your guts for smiling at them! I saw every one of the Star Wars movies in a dark setting (no joke! The living room was pitch black the first time I watched A New Hope and Return of the Jedi was in a theater on base!). I was encouraged to explore Madeline Le’Engle after my 5th grade teacher read it to us, and that reintroduced me to The Lord of the Rings, too (the animated movies!). My Dad (Mom, too!) encouraged my reading addiction, fed it, even!

As I got older, my Dad was the one everyone adopted on the Band bus. He was one of four who were always at every game, helping the drum line unload their instruments from the back of the bus and flipping burgers in the concession stand until I was pretty sure Sponge Bob would’ve been jealous of his skill! Everyone loved my Dad! Even more, everyone knew my Dad would be the one who helped them if they needed it. He bought my first car and took me with him to the salvage yard to find missing pieces for it! He’s the one who showed me how to change my tires and oil, even if he never let me actually do it. He is the one who shook his head and laughed when I told him about my exploits in keeping that car running when I drove it to school and home again, too. He never once let me believe he wasn’t proud of me, that his love for me was anything but full blown. Don’t tell him, but I really didn’t hang the big dipper all by myself. I’m pretty sure he thinks I did. Shhhh!

When I got into college, he was the one quietly making sure I got dinner on Sundays when I came over to wash my clothes. He changed the oil and rotated the tires on my new car, and spoiled my cat. He grilled pork chops and made sure there were a few extras, all while I crashed on the couch because I was overworking myself. He bought my first legal drink when I turned 21.

Since college, he’s supported all my crazy hobbies and trusted me when I said, “Dude, you should really try this. You’ll love it.” I’ve never steered him wrong! First was Harry Potter, then the Wheel of Time. Then I talked him into DragonCon and along came JordanCon. Now, it’s the SCA. He tries to put me off, “Tiff I don’t have time to read such a long series!” and “Do you think I have time for that?!” IN the end, he always gives in and he always sighs a few months down the road and tells me I’m right, while cursing me because he’s antsy to get on the next thing involved in this wonderful new thing I’ve drug him into.

In every single case, though, he doesn’t spend much time being “Tiff’s Dad.” Just like High School when everyone loved my Dad, everyone STILL loves my Dad. His identity becomes his own very quickly, because he is naturally charismatic and friendly and will talk to you about whatever you want to talk about for however long you want to talk. You can try drinking him under the table, but I should warn you that I get my tolerance honestly and so does he.

Just in case that wasn’t enough, I have the pleasure of learning new things about him all the time. I am 38 years old and in all that time, I have never once witnessed his PTSD. Don’t think I was ignorant about it,  though. My Dad survived Vietnam. You don’t get through something like that without long lasting scars. I grew up knowing there were conversations you didn’t start with him, movies he couldn’t watch, and actors and actresses who were forever on his crap-list. I heard stories about his reactions to things, though never actually witnessed it. At least, not until recently. I know part of him always thought anyone knowing his suffering would somehow diminish him in my eyes and nothing could be further from the truth. If anything, I love him more for it. I’m not alone, there, either. Witnessing it didn’t lower my opinion, it reinforced why my opinion is so high.

Memories of my Dad? I have many. I’m the lucky one who gets to keep adding to them, too.

Eat your heart out. He’s mine! 😉

~Until next time!

Posted in Uncategorized

It’s been a minute…

So, let’s get caught up, shall we?

Since I’ve been gone, I’ve been suffering from one heck of a depressive attack. You know, the kind where you decide you’re going to bully your way through it, get in the car to go on a trip you’d been planning for months and can’t get an hour up the road because you’re crying so hard you can’t see the lines, anymore? Yeah, that’s where I was two months ago. It hasn’t gotten much better until this last week and that’s made me realize something very important: I take too much on myself and believe that overload level to be an acceptable way to live because I’ve committed myself to things and people are depending on me.

Oddly enough, this would totally work if I didn’t have really big things that demand so much of me just by their very nature. You see, I have two beautiful children who need their mother more than the Kingdom of Meridies needs a Social Media Deputy (yeah, it was a demotion, but that’s neither here nor there). I have a husband who, though not horribly supportive of my insane habits and hobbies as I am of his, does expect me to do things like… I dunno, help cook dinner and wash clothes. Annoying, right? I have a job that expects me to be able to pay attention to the kids in my class and not have to answer insane questions on my phone from people who don’t work the same hours I do. See? These are kinda big things!

Now, I’m sure a lot of people are about to do what I’m about to do, so let me apologize up front. I’m going to use you mercilessly, you see. I don’t have a lot of people who read this, anyway, so it’s not like I’m really bothering anyone by writing it. If you are reading it, though, I want to be honest. I’m using this blog to keep myself in check. If I can’t write it in here and share it with the world, it doesn’t need to be said, right?

So, then, that brings us to my purpose for writing today. It’s that crazy time of year when everyone buys new calendars and starts planning for next year. It’s that time when people make resolutions and try to make themselves better people than the one they were last year. I read an article today that pointed out that the reason people are unhappy is because THEY decide to be unhappy. Crap happens, my friends, and you can either dwell on the crap or use it for fertilizer to make the good things grow to be beautiful things.

My goal is growth.

Personal growth, absolutely. I was accepted to start working on my Master’s degree, though I’m not really sure how I’m going to pay for it. I’ve become obsessed with Growth Mindset and how to develop it in students (and myself). I’m far from the woman I want to be remembered as, and I’m not getting any younger. Dr. Franklin is coming, kids!

Growth in my children, that’s a no brainer. Not just getting bigger physically, that’s going to happen whether I want it to or not. I want them to be good people that others look forward to being around. While that comes easier for one child than the other, I need to help them both find their way to letting their true selves out and help them flourish in this crazy world we live in.

Growth in my relationships- all of them. I’m a glutton for a good relationship and I vow to grease those bad boys and make them amazing. My family, my friends, my husband… the people who fill your life are the things that make them worth living and I want to grow into the person they deserve me to be.

Growth in my profession-in our ever-changing world, it’s the kids that need the most help. They’re the ones who hold our future in their hands and it’s my job to make that future solid. My Master’s degree, my research into growth mindset… all of this is geared towards making them better students in the future by making me a better teacher today.

In the coming days, you’ll see blog entries about how I’m putting this in action for myself. You are completely welcome to use whatever I post to enhance your life, too. If you have any questions, I’ll answer them the best I know how or find you links to help you if I can’t. If I spend this year talking to myself… that’s ok, too.

 

Carpe the heck out of this diem, my friends! 

 

Until next time,

~Tiff

Posted in Uncategorized

I’m tired.

I’m tired.

I’m tired of people having an opinion about things that have nothing to do with them. What’s worse, I’m tired of them forcing that opinion on others, telling them what they should say, or think, or do. Stop.

I’m tired of not being enough for anyone. I’m not enough teacher, not enough mom, not enough wife, not enough friend, not enough… Anything. No, I don’t want anyone to tell me I’m wrong because I’m not. I don’t do enough to keep anyone happy.

I’m tired of the never ending frustration that follows me everywhere I go. I’m frustrated because nothing goes the way it’s supposed to go. I’m frustrated because people don’t understand… Anything. I’m frustrated because I don’t seem to be getting anywhere, no matter how hard I pedal the wheels on the bike I call life.

I’m tired of not catching a break. Life has been crap for six weeks, now. Hurricanes, evacuations, running out of money while out of town, trees nearly falling on roofs, coordinating with tree companies to take the tree down, debris everywhere… There it’s literally no end to this list. I’ve had two friends die in 6 weeks. I have been to more meetings than I care to shake a stick at. I’ve tried teaching myself about growth mindset learning because I can’t get training anywhere else. Every time something goes right, I get slammed with something epically wrong.

I’m just tired. And I need a break.

Posted in Uncategorized

From the trenches…

I am writing this from a bad place.

I am in the middle of a relapse of depression, in which my meds are doing NOTHING to help me. I am very good at faking it most of the time. I’ve learned to compartmentalize pieces of my life so that one area of stress and depression doesn’t bleed into another. It also helps me keep things straight, so I don’t get overwhelmed by the stress as often as I used to.

Those methods are backfiring right now. You see, every one of those compartments are sources of depression, right now, so, just like the Titanic and those hull pockets, I’m taking on water and it’s dragging me under.

Writing this isn’t easy. My head is screaming at me about my drama-ridden, attention seeking BS. I even created a private board on Pinterest and started collecting quotes and combatting tactics for this. I wasn’t going to make it private, but changed my mind. Why? Because I thought someone would say something about me wanting attention over the thing.

My self-worth is in the toilet. I’ve hit a new low this weekend, too. I had committed to traveling to an event, to helping my friends celebrate the life of another friend, and to share the joy of being around people who just GET me. I tried to get there. I was packed, the van was loaded, I left work and got on the road. Then the girls started watching a show on the DVD player and I had time to think.

Thinking is the bane to my disease. When I think, I tell myself all sorts of horrible things. Some of them are probably true, I know a few are. The depth of that knowledge is painful and witnessing the other half of it is truly ugly. People who smile to your face and tell others you’re sucking up for something in the next breath.

Right now, all I want to do is sleep.

If I keep myself moving, it’ll be ok. I may not be dealing with it, but I can function without crying… most of the time. It’s those time I get a break, though, that take the cake. I am quick to anger, stare at nothing for a really long time in the middle of a conversation, and find it difficult to motivate myself to do anything.

So, when I send you a message and say, “I knitted today!” Please don’t blow me off! I haven’t touched it in days.

 

Anyway, I realize now that this post has devolved into babbling and I’m putting myself to sleep. Hopefully it wasn’t a total loss.

Until next time,

This is me, checking in at 213.6 lbs

Posted in Optimum Health, Tired of being Tired, Uncategorized

Breakthroughs come in different shapes…

Today has been a day of some serious tests for me. Let’s start at the beginning. I promise to tell you when the breakthroughs came.

I woke up, quite grouchy and groggy, when the kids started yelling at 7. I remained grumpy until 8, when I drug  myself out of bed to cook breakfast. This makes me extra grouchy, these days, because I get up and cook a breakfast I can’t eat. Biscuits, muffins, cinnamon rolls… even worse is that my youngest daughter has decided she doesn’t like eating any of those things and usually eats cereal and the oldest has decided she just doesn’t want to eat anything. I make them, hoping someone will eat them. My husband has confessed he’s “not much of a breakfast eater.” No, that doesn’t make any sense to me, either. It’s the thing I miss most! This morning, I was annoyed enough that I ate biscuits. I ate them with my homemade Peach preserves, even! I felt horrible, which had nothing to do with the biscuits. The grogginess, the aches in my shoulders, the pain in my back.

Since I felt like crap, I didn’t go to fighter practice. No, I don’t think I was contagious. It was just a bone-deep achiness that meant fighting was out for me today. This was the first test, I think. I could’ve stayed home, wallowed in my ickiness, and had the house to myself for a few hours. The girls were at a friends’ house for a play date. My husband was off to the track early to get some practice in before the races started.

I didn’t go back home after I dropped them off, though. I did something that I wasn’t sure I wanted to do: I went to a local Fiber Guild meeting. I wasn’t sure what to expect from that experience, to be honest, and I wasn’t sure how to approach it. I’m NOT a newbie with strings. I’ve been doing stuff with strings since I was in 3rd grade. In the last two years I’ve branched out considerably, and there’s so much more I want to do with strings! So, I jumped in. I took my craft bag in case I was ready to yawn myself to sleep at a business meeting (c’mon, they’re boring for newbies, especially newbies with no voting power or experience to have an opinion about anything), sat in the back corner (I would sit there, anyway, to be honest. That’s where I usually like to hide.), and knitted with my Bullet Journal open just in case I wanted to write anything down.

I get to go to school on Monday and tell those kids I was a risk-taker today! I had a great time! Most of the ladies there are older, but they’re just as enamored with strings as I am! They’re a bit more hippie about it, I think. I’m WAY MORE traditional with my patterns and things. They like free form quilting (huh?) and the things those ladies can dye and weave is simply amazing! The words “that captures the spirit I was feeling” came out of someone’s mouth and the nodding that went along with it across the room made me laugh (internally, of course. My mama taught me manners!). People came over to introduce themselves, though, and wanted to talk to me about the knitting I was doing. One other new person there brought some show-and-tell that was about 6 waist pockets that she had hand embroidered designs on. She didn’t know the name of the stitch (it was stem and I kind of hated her for how good it looked when mine still looks like crap!), but the designs were gorgeous, hand drawn, and close to perfectly stitched. She just picked up a needle a few months ago! After the meeting, the President walked over to introduce herself to me, specifically. There were 6 new people there and she introduced herself to ME! We talked about weaving for a bit (it’s on my list of things to learn, as soon as I can get my hands on  an inkle loom that doesn’t break the bank!) and she invited me to their workroom upstairs at Oatland Island after their little chat and munch session! Do I think I made the right decision in going to this meeting? ABSOLUTELY! I get paid on Thursday and my check for dues will be in the mail shortly thereafter!

Now, here comes another test. You see, this was a luncheon meeting. Sandwiches, fruit trays, veggie trays, and these amazing chocolate cookies that had a swatch of cream cheese icing and shaved chocolate bits on the top… yeah. I took one look at them setting that table up and my head said,

danger-will-robinson

The tour would happen AFTER the eating. I would have to sit and watch them eat that yummy smelling goodness and fight getting some of my own every second if I wanted to see that workroom, which I really, really did want to do! I did what any sensible person with an iron willed determination not to gain twenty pounds in chocolate cookies would do when faced with this situation, right slap in the middle of Oatland Island! I went to visit the wolves!

Yeah, you heard me right. I took my stuff out to the swagger wagon, locked it up and went for a walk! I decided that the main trail was only a little over a mile and I should be able to do that in about 30 minutes, probably less. Besides, the trail is mostly in the shade and it wasn’t TOO hot, yet. Maybe I’d hit my 10k steps today! I filled up my water bottle and struck out. I visited the wolf pups, who are so big, now! The last time I saw these guys, they were tiny, big footed, babies! Now look at them, all grown into their ears!

There was some damage from the storm on the walkway on the other side, but it doesn’t seem to have done any damage to their habitat, so yay!

wp-1473568727964.jpg

It made my walk a little longer, since I had to go the long way around this section of walkway, but that was alright. The detour was down a road that is restricted to staff go carts, so I’d never been down there. The Marsh Walk was open, so I doubled back so I could get that part of the trail in. I love that walk, and any other time, I take that walk VERY SLOW so I can appreciate how quiet it is out there. Today, it was more about getting my exercise, but I did watch the tide rolling in while I walked it and smiled at the fish biting in the marsh grass.

By the time I made it back to the main building, most everyone from the meeting had gone and the rest were already upstairs. I took the elevator up (I really want to walk up those stairs. Maybe I’ll ask next time. They’re gorgeous and I love them. It’s a Scarlet O’Hara thing, I think, but I am seriously in love with a good staircase. Anyway, I found the President upstairs with another member and 4 newbies. When I ducked into the workshop with my jaw on the floor, she turned and said, “Tiffany! I was looking for you before we came up! I thought you’d left before I could bring you up here!” You know, I learned something right then and there. You want newbies to stick around, make sure you know their names 40 minutes after you talk to them. Address them before they address you. And make sure they know you were looking out for them. I was floored! If I wasn’t in love with this bunch already, that would’ve sealed it for me. This is one of those things I’m going to have to remember going forward, I think. Now, here’s the porn from that workshop…

As a member, you have access to anything in that room as long as Oatland Island is open. FREE! If you need to take it home (and can get it out of there), there’s a small rental fee ($20 a month for a loom, people!), but you sign it out and take it home! It’s RIGHT THERE! That’s just… WOAH!

So, I left there, feeling good! I stopped at the Dollar Tree on Victory Drive to waste some time, then headed over for my 3 O’clock appointment for Painting with a Twist. I had prepaid for a friend and I to do this Beauty and the Beast stained glass piece with the rose and I’ve been looking forward to it since they posted it and I sent in our registration! I walk in the door and find out… the class started at 1, not 3. I had missed the thing! My buddy never showed, either! The lovely folks gave me a credit, so I can go another time and it’s already paid for. They didn’t have to do that, but they’re really awesome people and they did. I was still pretty upset about it, though, and sat in the parking lot for a cry before I backed out and decided what I was going to do with myself.

What did I decide? Well, I stopped at McDonald’s for a chocolate chip frappe to drown my sorrows, went to the track, and parked it on my husband’s couch, soaking up his AC in the trailer. I downloaded Netflix onto my phone and started an episode of the Gilmore Girls with my headphones in and worked on my knitting. I got to do that for an hour, which was kind of nice. He was racing, so he was in and out a few times, but otherwise, it was peaceful, quiet time for me. That’s its own kind of therapy.

Then I picked up the girls, picked up dinner and went back to the track to make sure my husband ate something. The girls made me go to the bathroom with them after we ate, then demanded to see the “ducks” on the way back. We were at Lake Mayer, and there are a ton of Canadian Geese, some mallards, seagulls, and random other birds like chickens, that hang out there. There was a family of kids throwing bread at them near the lake, and the girls thought that was awesome. I tried to keep them away from the kids, not wanting them to intrude on their fun, but their Dad brought my oldest a loaf of bread and said she could throw it at the birds, too. He’d stopped by the store on the way and I swear bought out the bread isle so his kids could enjoy feeding the birds. I was so touched by that and the way the kids just… played together, feeding the ducks and geese and laughing at their antics when the bread got too close to another bird. I had left my phone in the trailer, or I’m sure there would be a billion pictures of that moment to share with you!

I will put a bit of an aside here… I’m not a big one to talk about race issues. Honestly, it’s because I think they’re stupid. Actions speak louder than words or appearances and should always be what is used to decide whether you want to interact with someone or not. Judgement is for God, not me, so I accept that people are the way they are and if I don’t agree with something they DO (see how I didn’t say “how they look?” learn something, people!), then I don’t hang around with them. Modern society has made me suspicious of EVERYONE and, honestly, when it comes to my beautiful girls, I don’t trust ANYONE around them if I don’t know them, regardless of whether it’s an 80 year old white grannie or a 20 year old black guy! I’ve noticed something this summer that makes me happy, though. I blame racial idiots for my noticing it, but, thanks to the news, I’ve been a little more cognizant and concerned about how stirring up racial issues can affect my kids in public. They have NO CONCEPT of race and I like it that way. They truly judge whether they want to associate with people based on how those people treat them, and openly give everyone the benefit of reaching their hands out in friendship, regardless of ANYTHING! I think this is one of my biggest achievements as a mother, truly, and I pray that never changes. I bring this up because what I’ve noticed is that, no matter where I am, no matter what is on the news, the people of this city are NOT reacting to it. At least, not with open hostility every where. People hold doors for each other! The guy that handed my kid a loaf of bread had dark skin and a mouth full of gold teeth! I know people who would’ve run the other way when he walked up to them! Instead, we joked about kids and geese, and buying a ton of bread because they were there a few weeks ago and there was a big fight about the single loaf they’d brought not being enough for his kids to all feed the birds! I laughed because I didn’t bring ANY bread and this was far from my first trip to the lake! I’ve noticed the exact opposite of what I feared was about to start happening here and it makes me so happy that I’m proud to live here! Yes, our crime rate is not the best. Yes, lots of people get shot in this city every year. Yes, there are a lot of horrible things that go on around here on a daily basis. It’s not a perfect place! But it’s the same place where people from completely different worlds can laugh about bread and geese! It’s the same place where I held a door for four people when I stopped to get gas and only one of them thought that was weird, but all of them smiled and said “thank you!” I’ve made it a point to smile, look people in the eye and tell them to have a great day this summer. I’m an introvert, looking people in the eye is not something that comes easy to me. I’ve forced myself to do it, though, and what I see is that, when I do, they smile back. Their eyes smile back. I don’t care that color their skin is, how old they are, or the neighborhood they live in! They all smile back. THAT makes me feel good about this place. I challenge you to do the same. Be an equal opportunity smiler and see what happens!

OK, soap box over. The girls were exhausted by the time the little one finished eating and I had to make sure stop sweeping her Daddy’s trailer so we could leave, which I only did by promising she could sweep it when he got home and out of the shower. We came home, they played with their guinea pigs, then ran around like the loopy kids they were until bedtime. They’re really tough to handle when they’re like this. The little bursts into tears if you correct her behavior, the oldest one is completely off her medication and can’t control ANYTHING she does… it’s a really ugly scenario. Bedtime isn’t any better, either! I’ll save you the gory details about THAT. Let’s just say that was another tests. I’m a stress eater, and this stresses me out, all the time!

I combatted this by remembering that I had a laptop table out in the barn. Now, I will say that I was in the market for a pillow stand for my bobbin lace pillow, after fighting the flat surface of a tabletop while learning and my bobbins rolled or slid everywhere. Dianora, my teacher, said that I needed a slant and gave me some ideas for getting one, which ranged from a notebook to a pillow stand. I tested my laptop stand AND IT WORKED PERFECTLY! It has wrist rests built in that I was initially worried about, but it turns out, they’re perfectly placed to wedge the pillow in without damaging the pillow or allowing it to slip off the stand!

So, I cranked up the TV with Netflix, turned on the next episode of Gilmore Girls (I started season 2 the other day. I finished episode 6 tonight!) and got to work on the pattern Dianora was teaching me on a few weeks ago. It looked like this:

wp-1473568730137.jpg

It was awesome how easy this was to just twist and cross my happy little way through this pattern THREE TIMES! I think it looks like a good, old fashioned game of MasterMind when I get near the bottom!

wp-1473568730456.jpg

Admit it, I’m right!

mastermind

Anyway, so now I have about a yard and a half of bobbin lace that I made all on my own! It didn’t hold its shape very well, which is kind of sad, but it’s my first try, so there you go. I’ll try a different one tomorrow, maybe. Either way, I’ve got the crosses and twists down and even remembered the windmill cross at the intersections! Yeah, I had to take out half the lacing because I realized that I hadn’t been doing it, but hey! I learned!

wp-1473571666419.jpg

Ah, well, that’s been my day. It’s been a bit crazy, but overall, I think I enjoyed most of it. I have learned a lot, picked up a new couple of hobbies, and will be joining the Fiber Guild AND maybe the Friends of Oatland when I get paid on Friday. I guess we’ll have to see what kind of payraise they’re talking about before I get excited. LOL What’s really interesting about today is that I stayed on my plan for most of the day. I walked an extra 1.53 miles and broke a daily “busy time” record I’ve been holding on to for a while. I moved a lot today. Tomorrow will be full of cleaning for Peanut’s party next weekend… She’s into Minecraft. Please pray for me. HAHAHA

Until next time,

this is me, checking in at 215.7 lbs!

 

 

Posted in Optimum Health, Uncategorized

Of Tropical Storms, Heavy fighting, and Archery

The last few days have been… weird?

Friday, school was cancelled in preparation of Tropical Storm conditions. We lost power around 10 AM and didn’t get it back until after 8 PM. So, we had a great day with no power! The girls didn’t get wacky until around 6, we grilled dinner and cooked sides on a hot plate fueled by a generator. It was like camping, except inside our house! The girls got “candle dinner” which is one of their favorite things. Don’t get excited, it’s just turning off all the lights, or not having power for the lights, so we light every candle I have on the table so we can eat. They love it. Then, we lit every candle in the den for light as the sun went down. I’m kind of impressed by how good it looks lit up that way, honestly.

20160902_190031.jpg

Saturday was a busy day. I got in armor for Fighter Practice on Saturday and got two good fights in before my wrist decided it had had enough. I have carpal tunnel. I wrapped it in a boxer’s brace and it didn’t go well. The vibration of the blows irritated the crap out of my wrist. So, back to the drawing board there. I hung out around the house and watched a pair of kids who are seriously the easiest ones on the planet to watch. Then the girls and I went to dinner at Olive Garden. We came home and started watching a movie! The little one fell asleep on the couch, so I put her to bed around 8:30. Naturally, the power went out before I got the big one in bed. I wasn’t looking forward to trying to get her into bed, but it turns out, I had completely exhausted her and she crashed after about 10 minutes! I went to bed, too. I had worn myself out, as well, apparently. The power came on about 9:30, so there’s that.

20160903_183228.jpg

Then, there’s today. It seems that every thing that was set out to do today turned into a thing. We left to take my husband to work to get his hours, but he forgot his security badge, so no getting in to get his stuff. We drove all the way to Pooler before he realized it. We did get a great lunch at Los Bravos in Pooler. After which we came all the way back home and took a short nap. Then I drove out to the park for Archery practice. I shot a 14, which is great for me! Doesn’t hold a candle to what my friends shot, but there you go. I shot better than I did the last time (only a 6, then). It was really the only thing that worked in my day. Then we set out to get dinner and hit Walmart. We started at Dickie’s Bar-B-Que. They were out of chicken, mac and cheese and mashed potatoes, so we didn’t stay for food. We ended up at Huddle House. Insane, right? They had grilled chicken, though, so all’s right with the world! It was too late for the Wal-mart trip, so that’ll have to wait until tomorrow.

The best part, however, was that I crashed through 20 pounds this weekend. I hit 219 this weekend! I stuck to my plan ALL WEEKEND, even through the lack of power on Friday! SQUEE!

So, here we are! One more day of my long weekend (I really love how long this weekend has been! I need this more often!) to go and I’m really hoping it is slow and easy! Wish me luck with that!

 

Until next time!

This is me, checking in at 219.3 lbs! ❤